Journal

Showing posts with label A Wedding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label A Wedding. Show all posts
Thursday, January 02, 2014

How I cope with the social media cravings, and in which I begin to become a blogger once again...

It's my third Wedding Anniversary today. Amanda and I are in Boston, and there's a blizzard warning. We have our house in Cambridge for another five days. Amanda goes to Australia on Saturday morning.

Two days in to Neil off Social Media, and it's interesting. I've a novel I'm reading on my phone's Kindle app, and whenever I would have been tempted to go and look at my Twitter Feed or Tumblr or Facebook, I read Gene Wolfe's THE LAND ACROSS instead. This is a good thing because 1) it is a very good book, and 2) it reminds me of the joy and power of fiction and 3) it distracts me from what had become a very automatic thing to do.

I wrote a rather sad email to friends yesterday, about not going to Australia, which is what I'd planned to do in January: accompany Amanda to Sydney, where she is playing in the Festival, and then on to Melbourne. I have people I was looking forward to spending time with, and things I was looking forward to doing... and then Amanda's book deadline moved (she's writing a book) and we both knew that if I went with her, she wouldn't make her deadline: when we're together we talk and we do things and we spend time together and are nice social human beings, when apart we are driven lunatics who make art.

My friend Kelly Fogarty wrote back from Melbourne and said, "If you're sad today you're only creating a memory of sadness for whenever you think of your last day with Amanda before she comes out here. People keep telling me that the way you spend January 01 is indicative of the rest of your year. If you spend it surrounded by sadness rather than excitement about both your upcoming adventures then where's the fun in that, or anything, for the rest of 2014?"


.... and I looked around. The contents of the house in Cambridge that's been our home together for 14 months is mostly in boxes right now, preparing to be moved out. But yesterday, the first of the year, our friends Rachel (from the Army of Broken Toys) and her partner Clare got married in the house: they decorated it with lights and string and repurposed ancient musical scores, and made it more beautiful in a day than we ever had when we were there.

The wedding was wonderful, the house was filled with happy people, the music was wonderful, I was having marvelous conversations with glorious folk dressed in their best clothes, and cocktails  and punch and mulled cider were being drunk, and you could feel the love and fellowship and joy in the air. I even danced with my wife. I thought about writing a wedding, one filled with love and joy. I think I will (although it is true that when I told Amanda the wedding plot that was in my head, a mysterious murder happens in the middle of it).

I couldn't think of a better way to start a year, surrounded by joy and warmth and love. I hope that 2014 is a gentle year -- many amazing things happened in my world in 2013, but there were too many deaths, too many small tragedies. I'll take love and fellowship and twinkly lights and brown-paper decorations.

...

It's been a while since I've answered questions from the FAQ line here, mostly because the things coming in mostly stopped being things that could be answered, while people were really good on Twitter or Tumblr about asking easily answerable questions. But for at least the first six months of this year, questions and answers are going to be here. And look, a question I can answer. So...

Is it true you are selling your Minneapolis home and buying a house in Cambridge? If yes, WHY?

Nope. The house in Cambridge was the one we moved into last November, mostly to be near to Amanda's friend Anthony while he went through chemotherapy. We rented it, and we're moving out in a few days.

We're planning on buying a house together in New York state right now.

I've no plans to sell the house near Minneapolis. It's such a happy place in my life and in my heart: it's where my children grew up. It has the best library ever. In the long term, I may well make it a Writers Retreat for writers who mostly aren't me.

I love it, and spent over 20 years making it somewhere I wanted to be and wanted to write, but had never planned to die there. That was my home. The new place will be my house and Amanda's house. I'm happy to have the adventure of building a life and a home together.

...

I just got a delighted email from Rosemary Brosnan, my editor at Harper Childrens, to tell me that FORTUNATELY, THE MILK is now is its 15th week on the various bestseller lists. I love that it seems now to have become one of those books that sells through word of mouth, through people telling each other they ought to read it, that it's funny, that kids are staying up late and reading it under the covers with flashlights, that adults have discovered it's funny if you're an adult, that kids are reading aloud to their parents, all that...

So, as a thank you to all of you who have bought it or read it or told each other about it, here's a picture nobody's ever seen in this form. The art that Skottie Young did to convince my publishers that he would be right to draw the book:


Which Skottie wound up colouring in and making into the cover. Because it was perfect.

...

And finally, here is the amazing Lady Rizo, singing a song by me (with chords by Amanda) on her first solo album. She has a remarkable voice, and if you ever get the chance to see her, you will not regret it...

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Monday, August 08, 2011

Three Weddings and a Fringe

I'm in Edinburgh.

Last week Amanda and I had a sort of a family wedding-party in Skye, where much of Amanda's family is originally from, mostly so that our families could meet each other. They all came a very long way, and we were touched and impressed. Only family, no friends (except Sxip Shirey and his bandmates in the Luminescent Orchestrii, who were the "wedding" band). The party was at Clan Donald, and the people and the food were both wonderful.

It made me happy watching Amanda's white-bearded gentlemen in kilts encounter my North London Jewish relatives. At one point Amanda and I were hoisted onto chairs for a Jewish chair dance, while the bagpipes played. I do not believe this is something that has happened a lot in human history. (The piper was Amanda's cousin Hugh.)

I suspect both sides of the family think we're a bit mad, but they are happy to indulge our madness, and we were glad that they did.


Neil Gaiman's photo Saturday Night. From the seven-months-after-the-wedding Wedding Party. You can't tell that the music is bagpipes and klezmer, but it is. (Photo by my cousin Elaine Wolf.)
Neil Gaiman on WhoSay

(Here's a photo by my cousin Elaine. The actual photos were done by my cousin Elliott.)

For those keeping count, this was our third wedding: the first was the art-surprise flashmob one that Amanda astonished me with in New Orleans, the second was the real one on January the second. I think we're done now, although we've talked about having a party for friends, and we may still...

Amanda, Holly, Maddy and I are staying in a rented house in Edinburgh. I'm writing and catching up on email, Amanda is catching up on email and planning her next couple of years, and we're going to a lot of Edinburgh Fringe events.

(So far I think my favourites, of many, have been Belt Up's The Boy James and what I think was the tightest incarnation of Fascinating Aida I've seen in 28 years. Holly and Maddy both loved The Damsel in Shining Armour and Maddy also wanted me to mention how much she'd liked Sunday in the Park With George.)

Amanda and I co-edited the Scottish Big Issue's Fringe Supplement. We interviewed old friends (I talked to Iain Banks - an interview that's in The Big Issue all over the UK -- Amanda to Margaret Cho, both of us talked to Dillie Keane), we recommended things. Here's my link to Book Festivally things - http://www.bigissuescotland.com/features/view/558). And here is Amanda's guide (with occasional interpolations from me) to more theatrical/comedy/musical things: http://www.bigissuescotland.com/features/view/559.

I'm doing pretty good - Over the last couple of days I've written an introduction to Rudyard Kipling's The Jungle Book, and I wrote very short story yesterday for the Guardian, in addition to the longer stuff I'm working on - but I'm starting to think seriously about retiring from email. I can't keep up with the amount coming in, and after a long day's e-mail answering I feel like I've done a day's work, and I haven't.

Sigh. And grumble.

Loving the time with both daughters. Missing the dogs and the bees. Felt almost guilty when I heard that we'd got the blue ribbon for honey and cut comb at the country fair for the Fourth Year running: guilty that I wasn't there, and that Lorraine had to extract the honey and cut the comb.

...

This endearing silent film made by children in Toronto, is probably an entry for the 90 Second Newbery award. You can find out about the award at http://jameskennedy.com/90-second-newbery/ By the way, the award entry date has just been extended to October 17th...



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Monday, January 03, 2011

Yes


At the end of the wedding ceremony last night, our friend Jason Webley (who got ordained on the internet, and wrote a wonderful ceremony and married us) read this poem by e.e. cummings:

i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky;and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun's birthday;this is the birth
day of life and love and wings:and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any-lifted from the no
of all nothing-human merely being
doubt unimaginably You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)
I found myself mouthing along with it, like a prayer: I'd closed the last issue of Black Orchid with it, over twenty years ago, and it was still there in my head, saying yes in the best possible way.

Amanda and I married on Sunday night (actually and legally, this time) almost on the spur of the moment. The handful of people who were at the wedding were the people we were going to have dinner with on the Second of January anyway. They just got a little more than they were expecting.

The evening was hosted and improvised with love and gusto by our friends the Chabon-Waldmans, and Daniel Handler played the accordion when Amanda came down the stairs wearing the dress she had worn as a human statue, so long ago. Rosie Chabon, cutest creature on earth, was our flower girl. Mexican food was eaten, and pie, pie in enormous quantities.

Probably getting married in a friend's parlour, with a dozen friends around who weren't really expecting this but who threw themselves into making a wedding for us out of nothing, and a daughter and a son lending their support and love, isn't how everyone would plan a wedding. But we'd been engaged exactly a year, and it felt incredibly right to improvise a wedding as we went along. So we did it. And were as happy as any two people had ever been.

And then today, after a night together, Amanda went to Australia, and I went home to the cold. We won't see each other for ten days, until we meet in Tasmania; and while everything else just happened and wasn't organized, but just fell perfectly into place, I've decided there's a lot to be said for organised honeymoons that immediately follow weddings. Losing your bride immediately smacks of carelessness.

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Wednesday, November 17, 2010

The Wedding Mystery Explained

I went to New Orleans and I had the best birthday I've ever had.

There was food (the best New Orleans food, which is the best food in America. I loved eating at the Commander's Palace, and at Muriel's, but I loved The Green Goddess more - Chefs Chris and Paul are heroes). (The "Mezze of Destruction" secret message should still give you a secret foodie easter egg of some kind, if you eat there and say it to your server. It's the secret "Neil sent me" code.)

On the morning of my birthday I was surprised by a wonderful unexpected art-event flashmob wedding.

If you head over to Amanda's blog and read this (and you should. Trust me) http://blog.amandapalmer.net/post/1597897908/still-life-with-wedding-party
you will learn what Amanda did and how she pulled it off. It was amazing.

And once you've read that (go and read it. It'll make more sense of the rest of this) head over to http://www.kylecassidy.com/pix/travel/2010/nfgafpnola/afp-nfg-wedding-album-1.pdf in order to see some beautiful photos arranged into a wedding album by Kyle Cassidy. I don't think I knew that any of those photos were being taken except for the last.

As you read Amanda's blog and look at Kyle's photos you can marvel at the ease with which she persuaded me, without in any way suspecting anything was odd, to wear a top hat in my search for breakfast and tea; you can observe the way that I am astonished by Amanda's first surprise and then banjaxed by her second as a wedding party appears from nowhere; then marvel at the way that, when I think I can be no happier, she tops it with an actual produced-out-of-nowhere cup of tea.


This was how it ended (click on the photo to see it big enough to appreciate it), with Amanda and me with white paint on my face flanked by my glorious daughters, with our friends making happy faces and me holding tea.

Next time we get married, I'll marry the lady, not the statue, and there will be invited people and not a flash mob, and I'll know it's happening in advance, and there will be a paper and it will be legally recognised, but I cannot imagine it will be any more joyous than this was. And truthfully, after that morning's magical wedding, I don't think I could ever feel more married.



A lovely photo of Maddy and me and Holly by Adriane Biondo
...

(PS: As a result of the last interim post, I have learned that the Sushi making kit was from Lena St George-Sweet and Hamish Brown. I love my blog.)

(PPS: More of the New Orleans trip to come)

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Saturday, August 19, 2006

post-wedding post

I'm online and accessing the internet using my clever new phone.

So, it was a wonderful wedding -- I think, the best I've ever been to. I did my best man thing fine -- I made a speech in the middle of the wedding (which is where best man speeches come in Spanish Weddings, I am told) and I didn't lose the rings, which is good, on both counts.

I gave Mark and Irma a few fun gifts, but the best of them was a blank book for the people at the wedding party to write or draw things in. And because I don't think I have a connection speed that'll allow me to upload any photos, I'm going to post what I wrote on the first page of the book.


This for you, for both of you,

a small poem of happiness
filled with small glories and little triumphs
a fragile, short cheerful song
filled with hope and all sorts of futures

Because at weddings we imagine the future
Because it's all about "what happened next?"
all the work and negotiation and building and talk
that makes even the tiniest happily ever after
something to be proud of for a wee forever

This is a small thought for both of you
like a feather or a prayer,
a wish of trust and love and hope
and fine brave hearts and true.

Like a tower, or a house made all of bones and dreams
and tomorrows and tomorrows and tomorrows

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